Here come the perks...

June 9, 2009.

So a very wise reader of mine left a very wise comment on my last post about telling Todd sooner than later how I feel to avoid further pain for either one of us. Very wise. Also, advising me to stick to my plan of abstinence since that's what I set out to do this year. Also very wise...

Now, I've been thinking about his wise words all day and agreeing in my head and trying to come up with a good way to approach this subject with Todd, when I went to check my email and found this:

"After Sunday I was lying in bed rethinking my comment about 'buying' a loto ticket to get you in a movie, and that's BS, your fate will not be decided by that. I know you r good, you know you r good. Goods things will come;)
I hope your interview went well.

This sat, my friends hawaiian themed bday party is in encino, going all night. Should be a lot of fun and if you can make it, you'll meet a lot of my friends you haven't seen.

Also, I wanted to throw this out there now, in July, weekend of 9th-12, would you be up for a mini weekend vacation in.........COSTA RICA!!!!??!?!

I met this amazing couple in South America. The best couple and parents I've ever met. He was an actor on the HBO series 'OZ' and she is a cake baker, both lived in NY for years, so many 'I' similiarities;)
Anyhoot, they have a place down there and are begging me visit and I'm leaning towards yes and obviously want you there!
Let's chat about it the next time I see you.

Have a great day, miss ya, see you soon;)"

~Todd

Fuck.

What's a girl to do? Part of me wants to be extremely selfish and play along until I get a free trip to Costa Rica and some possible career connections. The other part knows this is terrible and knows I should do something about this now rather than later. But, not gonna lie...I'm a bit torn right now. Just out of curiosity...what would you do? And don't think about morals too much, what would you really want to do?? Be honest!

How Old is too Old?

February 15, 2009.

So I’ve had Ray on the brain all day and haven’t stopped smiling. How old is too old? And should we put a limit on age for relationships? I was also thinking today, that if I ever dated Ray, for reals, would I flip out on my 30th if we were still together and go through a mini crisis about him looking at younger girls? (He’d be 44 at that time btw…yikes!) I feel like then the age difference doesn’t seem so grand. A 30yr old woman dating a 44-yr. old man. Not so bad, right?

Ugh, well, I haven’t much to report on the man front today, since I spent 90% of my day in bed…just for fun and 10% at improv, where we all know the men are mostly engaged or taken. Ray did text me this morning and wants to hang out on Friday for his birthday. I didn’t respond yet, and he called and left me a message saying the same thing. I’m trying to not be so anxious and screw up anything by being too anxious too soon.

Um, this week shall be interesting my friend Mark is flying in from NY. We’ve been BF since highschool and he’s coming to cali for family reasons, but I’m picking him up from the airport tomorrow bright and early, then have to be back up here for an Improv show. Then I have a few gigs lined up this week. I am going to make $400 this week. Yes I am. So, I will most likely be busy. Then Friday is Ray, Lindsay’s and our friend Crazy’s birthday. I kind of already know what I want to get Ray, but I’m not sure I should buy him anything, just yet.

We shall see. Updates Manana.