Hypocrites

March 30, 2009.


Chatted with one of my best ladies from the east coast yesterday. Told her about Seattle and my upcoming trip. She shared a little about her current..."thing", I'm not sure what to call it yet, but she said she never really wants to talk about it too much, because when she's done that in the past things never seem to work out. I know exactly what she means. You hype something up to your friends and then either you end up feeling like you have to make it as good as it sounds, even when it's not, or just suck it up and admit you were wrong. I've been keeping Seattle a bit of a secret. I think I have the same superstition that something might go terribly wrong if I share my happy thoughts too soon.

Chatted with Seattle again (twice) yesterday. It's funny because I never ever want to hang up the phone with him, and yet I feel like I always find myself in a situation where I have to go. I'm always rushing. I'd never want him to think that I am in fact rushing the convo, perhaps that's why I always need to call him again.

I realized after our conversation last night that he makes me feel normal. I don't have to put on a show or hide anything about myself. It's the nicest feeling. He makes me feel great. I shared with him some exciting news about my acting career and his reaction said it all. He was just as excited as I am. I appreciated that. It's hard to find people, even friends who genuinely get excited that things are going your way. People are always jealous or too concerned with themselves to care if things are going well with you.

Rick called me this morning. I avoided it. Let him leave a message. I couldn't help but laugh when I listened to it. He was apologizing for "drunk dialing" me the other night from the bar and explained the situation with the older woman again. Apparantly, she was 50 and "when did it become ok for women that age to hit on him"?? Hmm...now if i do the math correctly, that's 14 years older than him. He is 12 years older than me. When did it become ok for men that age to hit on me?? Ha. I mean I don't really think of him as being "too old" for me, but it's funny to see how he reacts when the situation is reversed. Guys are so dumb.

Well...the roomie or "little bro" as I'll call him, is getting cooler each day. He text me last night while I was at improv and asked if I wanted him to save me some dinner he was cooking. How sweet. When I got home, we ended up chatting for about an hour and I learned that he is uber talented. He not only d.j's, but he break dances, produces amazing music videos, edits, draws incredibly and wants to act. I'm excited to be surrounded with talent that definitely is going to go somewhere. So different than Margaret's unmotivated spirit that loomed over the apartment. I'm hopeful.

Well, let the countdown begin...18 days till Washington. Psyched.